


Demons and Hungry Ghosts

by junko



Series: Chasing Demons [24]
Category: Bleach
Genre: Abusive Partner, Abusive Relationship, Canon-Typical Violence, M/M, Original Character(s), mentions of abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-15
Updated: 2012-12-15
Packaged: 2017-11-21 05:18:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/593880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/junko/pseuds/junko
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sensitive to what happened with reincarnated-Hisana, Renji tries to run interference once he and Byakuya are back at the estate, only to smack headfirst into his and the captain's past....</p>
            </blockquote>





	Demons and Hungry Ghosts

**Author's Note:**

> Somehow, quite miraculously, I'm back on theme. Unfortunately, this causes much angst and misunderstanding for our boys.

Renji gave Byakuya space the entire trip back through the senkaimon, letting the silence stretch between them. He really wished he could assure the captain that Hana/Hisana would be all right, but… well. At least she’d have one less worry with his money in her pocket, and, with any luck, she’d call those numbers Kurosaki senior had given her and maybe check into a shelter or talk to other people who’d been through the same thing. Renji still couldn’t believe Byakuya was able to let her go. Though, from the look of him, Byakuya didn’t seem too happy about the situation.

Once back at the estate, Renji ran interference. He sent Byakuya off to the sento and let the staff know that the captain shouldn’t be disturbed except for meals. “Absolutely no family visits,” Renji told the house steward, Eishirō, in no uncertain terms. “I don’t care who’s on the docket. The last thing the captain needs right now is to interact with anyone who was ever cruel to Hisana.”

“That rules out the entire Kuchiki clan, the royal court, and the Soul King himself,” Eishirō said dryly from where he leaned against the hearth in the kitchen. He was dressed in his usual simple black kimono and had his hair tied back neatly. Like the rest of the staff that had gathered in the kitchen upon hearing of Renji’s arrival, Eishirō looked decidedly refreshed, as if they all slept better without ‘his lordship’ there.

Renji, meanwhile, was exhausted. The adrenaline that had kept him going after they’d stumbled across reincarnated-Hisana was starting to fade. Renji leaned against the chopping table, having decided to wait for Miki to make up a tray of food and bring to Byakuya himself. Yuu, the tea boy was also there, crouching by the hearth, and the dishwasher sat on her stool by her station watching everything with wide eyes.

Eishirō tapped a finger against his lower lip, “I shall have to make some adjustments. There’s a bit of a queue.”

Renji asked, “Can’t you just say the captain’s had a relapse? That’s what I was planning on telling the Sixth.”

“Yes, of course,” Eishirō said with the air of ‘I’d already thought of that’ in the sniff that followed.

Renji was about to snap at the steward to remind him that there was no need for pettiness, when Miki, stopped her fussing over breakfast to wring her hands in her apron and ask, “The Lady Hisana… you actually saw her, Renji? How was she?”

Everyone glanced at Renji then; he could tell they were anxious for news. Looking at their hopeful faces, he was really tempted to lie, but his Inuzuri past wouldn’t let him. Renji shook his head, “Not good. What can I say? Fate’s a right bastard. Ain’t no way the Lady Kuchiki deserved what she got handed this time around.”

Renji sketched out enough of the scene so that they’d get the picture without having to have all the painful details. Then, he added, “And, the captain’s money isn’t going to solve the half of it. He thinks he’s fixed everything--and we’re going to all let him believe that—but this kind of shit runs deep. Some stuff you can’t walk away from because it follows you no matter where you go or how far you run.” He had to stop. His own life was starting to get tangled up in his thoughts about Hisana, so he shook off his mounting anger and said, with a sigh, “But, Urahara and Yoruichi are there. I got to hope they’ll check in with her from time to time. I’ve already tasked myself to do the same if I’m ever assigned to the Human World.”

“And his lordship?” Eishirō asked. “Will he visit her? Will the Lady Shihōin send him reports?”

“I’m not sure, but right now he doesn’t want to know,” Renji explained. “It sounds cold, but it’s smart. If he really understood the extent of her situation, he’d be moving to the Human World fulltime, and, you know what, I don’t that would be good for either of them. If I were her, I’d want the opportunity to stand on my own feet this time through. You have no idea how much it helps your soul to crawl your own way out of hell and make something of your life, in spite of the all the bastards who tried to keep you down, tried to break you. Best fucking revenge, I tell you: living well.”

Renji had to stop again. This was all far too personal. Every time he started in about her, he ended up back in his own past. He unclenched his fists and let out another long, deliberate breath. As he flexed his fingers, Renji was amazed at how much this whole thing with Hana/Hisana had affected him, how much it was dragging all of Inuzuri’s crap back into the fore. He wasn’t even sure what it was about her situation that was freaking him out, but it was all suddenly on the surface, like a raw, exposed nerve.

 _Shhh_ , Zabimaru hissed comfortingly, _you’re here with us now_.

“Right,” he muttered, absently patting the zanpakutō’s hilt. Inuzuri was a long, long way from the Seireitei. He needed to leave it there, beyond the walls and defenses, where it belonged.

Renji shook himself out, and glanced around the silent kitchen. Everyone looked as shell-shocked as he felt. Renji had forgotten that most of them had probably grown-up at the estate and had never lived a life remotely like his or Hisana’s.

Eishirō cleared his throat to break the dark mood. “We can all say a prayer for her ladyship, and remember, as always, to honor her at the shrines,” Eishirō said quietly, his face pale and drawn. “I can’t imagine such a thing would hurt.”

Renji wasn’t convinced it would help, but you never knew. It wasn’t like anyone’d ever prayed for him.

#

Renji brought the breakfast tray through the private entrance of the sento. Given the hour, there was probably a long line of disgruntled would-be bathers pissed off that they were being turned away to preserve Byakuya’s privacy. But, that was one of the privileges of owning the place, Renji figured. He stuck his head in and said, “It’s just me.”

Renji took the thundering silence as permission to enter.

The captain was immersed in the hot water up to his pale, narrow shoulders, staring blankly at the wisps of steam rising from the surface. He didn’t even look up as Renji set the tray on the lip of the pool beside him. But, undeterred, Renji poured a bowl of strong tea and held it out, “At least drink some tea, huh?”

Byakuya accepted it without a word. 

Renji crouched at the side of the pool, tepid water soaking into his tabi, steam clinging heavily to his shihakushô. He glanced at the changing room. He’d love a chance to wash, but it didn’t seem like Byakuya was in the mood for company. “Right,” Renji said, standing up and heading back toward the door. “There’s loads of tea. I had them make you an extra pot. I’ll probably take a nap, and then go check in at the Sixth. I can give you an update later, if you’re up for it.”

“Should I have done more, Renji?”

Renji’d been about to slide open the door. At Byakuya’s question, he stopped and glanced back. Byakuya’s expression was as blank as always, but his face was bowed slightly, his hair hanging in wet strands. He looked… defeated.

“Not much more you could have done,” Renji said with as much assurance as he could muster. “You did your best by her.”

“We could have killed her,” Byakuya’s deep voice echoed ominously on the tiled walls of the bathhouse, “Hidden her at the estate.”

“We still could,” Renji reminded him. It would be a disaster on so many levels, but it wasn’t like Renji couldn’t understand the impulse. Anyway, Byakuya was the captain. If he decided to do it, there was no stopping him. Given that, Renji would rather be the one at his side then have Byakuya order some other squad member into this mess. Renji continued, “That option’s on the table as long as she’s alive.” 

_And, if we know where she is and can get to her_ , Renji added silently. He wouldn’t put it past Urahara and Yoruichi to be hiding Hana/Hisana somewhere Byakuya could never find her even now. 

“Just say the word, Taicho,” Renji said.

At that, Byakuya blinked and looked over his shoulder to meet Renji’s steady gaze. “Is that so? I thought you were happy to see Hana, what was it, ‘Take the money and run far, far away.’”

“Yeah, and I still am,” Renji said gruffly in acknowledgment. “And, I still think what you did was the right thing, letting her go. I say we’re all better for it. But, I can’t stand between you and your wife… or, gods forbid, you and your honor.”

Byakuya let out a dark chuckle, and turned back to take a sip of his tea, “Indeed.”

Assuming that was his cue to leave, Renji put his hand on the door again.

“Your understanding in this matter has been… remarkable,” Byakuya said, his voice much softer, almost grateful. 

“I’ve got my own reasons,” Renji admitted. He let his hand drop. He considered just dumping his clothes and Zabimaru where he stood, and coming into the pool without a shower. He’d clearly read Byakuya’s mood wrong, and his socks were soaking wet and the rest was getting chilled from the damp. But, unwilling to enter the water without a clear invitation, Renji just leaned a shoulder up against the back wall and the mosaic of Mount Fuji.

“And what are those?” Byakuya asked. 

“Any soul that’s spent time in Inuzuri is kin, as far as I’m concerned,” Renji said simply. There was a lot more to it, of course. But, he really didn’t want to get into the similarities between his life and Hana/Hisana’s; he didn’t trust himself not to get all jittery and angry again. Renji crossed his arms in front of his chest, and added, “Besides, what’s important to you is important to me.”

Byakuya pushed his hair from his face, and took a long, thoughtful sip his tea. “You would have tolerated her, had I insisted?”

Tolerated? And insisted on what, exactly? What was the captain hoping for here? A sense they’d have all settled into playing ‘happy families’? Was he hoping that Renji would have been okay with an extra person in their bed? That maybe the captain could have had both: a wife and a lover? And what would that be like, knowing Byakuya’s predilections? Hana/Hisana gets all the sweetness and public affection, while Renji gets tied up and spanked in some dark back room? 

“I love you a whole hell of a lot,” Renji said. “But I’ve got my pride.”

“Yes, of course,” Byakuya said quietly, seeming to return his attention to the wisps of steam and his tea.

Renji pursed his lips. If Byakuya had wanted to have them both, they should have all stayed in the Human World. At least there, there was some hope of things being divided more equally. Not that Renji didn’t figure he’d still be on the losing end of that bargain, but, at least away from the Soul Society, there wouldn’t be the complications of rank or the expectations of Byakuya’s family. Renji would still be the odd one out in society’s view, but at least they’d have the chance of being open about being together. 

But, in this fantasy world where the Soul Society didn’t instantly hunt them down and drag them back, what would it even be like--Byakuya without his estate, the kenseikan, all the familial responsibility that implied, the captaincy--the things that defined him and their relationship from the beginning? 

And could Renji live with Hana/Hisana and with Byakuya bouncing back and forth between him and her? And what would he do if he saw Byakuya kissing her--or even just heard the sounds of their lovemaking or, worse, smelled the scent of her on him? Renji was pretty sure his heart would explode from jealousy. It was getting pretty close just trying to imagine it.

Lost in his own thoughts, Renji was startled by Byakuya’s voice. “How could she have made such terrible choices, Renji?”

Renji grunted. He had no idea what Hana/Hisana’s situation was like, but he knew enough about his own to shrug and say, “It’s never that simple and it’s not always a real choice, anyway. Sometimes the only options are: shit and shittier. When that’s the case, shit seems like a gift.”

“Ah,” Byakuya said. It was a helpless sort of sound, like he wanted to understand, but knew he couldn’t. 

“You’re not doing yourself any favors imagining the worst,” Renji reminded Byakuya. _Or me_ , Renji thought, because there was Inuzuri at his back again, like the hot breath of a wolf, making the hairs on the back of his neck tingle.

“How can I do anything else?” 

There was a desperate sort of pity in Byakuya’s tone that Renji found irritating, so he snarled, “You could try not being such a privileged dick.”

“What?” Byakuya snapped, his gray eyes instantly pinning Renji in their intense gaze. “What did you just say?”

From the sudden increase in spiritual pressure, Renji knew should probably stop talking, but, he’d finally hit on what was bothering him about this whole situation. So, instead, he repeated, louder: “I said you’re being a privileged dick. How about you stop insulting your wife with this victim shit? It’s really fucking self-righteous to assume you’re the best thing for her.”

Byakuya took in a hiss of breath and his eyes widened dangerously. Reistsu bore down on Renji, making his knees tremble.

If Byakuya show of power was supposed to make Renji want to shut up and back down, it had the opposite effect. Renji pushed back with his own spiritual pressure, and continued, “I don’t know how you can say you love her when you disrespect her so much. You don’t think she’s got any strength of her own, do you? Any ability to make a go of it without your noblesse-fucking-oblige? What makes you think you know better how to live her life? How do we know she might not have ended up at the clinic on her own if we hadn’t been there? She was headed in that direction, and for all we know, if we hadn’t been standing over her, pointing out her hiding place, Naoki might have passed her by. She was getting away, Taicho. You didn’t save her. She was already saving herself. But you don’t give her any credit for that. And now, she won’t either. She’s going to think she needs some knight in a shiny fucking haori to pick her off the feet she was already standing on. Class,” Renji spat, “Doesn’t give you the right to fuck up her life, her pride in herself. Did you do it last time too? Is this why she’s got to go through this hell again? Because you robbed her of her own strength when you ‘rescued’ her all your money?”

There was a sound like a crack and Renji was on his hands and knees, gasping for breath. Kidō? Some kind of focused reistsu blast? Renji had no idea. But Byakuya’s spiritual pressure continued to bare down on him, until, despite his monumental efforts, it slowly pressed Renji’s face to the tile, until he was laid flat as though in supplication.

Renji glared angrily at Byakuya. _I don’t know how you can stand there thinking you saved Hana/Hisana from a bullish thug… I wonder if Naoki ever held her face to the bathroom tile for sassing back, for telling him the truth he didn’t want to hear?_

But Renji had no air to speak. He couldn’t even move a muscle, despite the fact that they all strained desperately. He could even feel Zabimaru trying to add his power to no avail. Byakuya was just too damn strong.

“Go.” Byakuya said, his back stiff and turned. The pressure let up suddenly, leaving Renji quivering helplessly and gasping for breath. “You’re dismissed, lieutenant.”

Renji had to crawl to the door.

#

Renji slept in his own bed for the first time in what felt like months. His quarters had a decidedly musty, shuttered smell. Despite all the emotions roiling in his guts, he collapsed onto his cot and passed out almost immediately.

His dreams, however, struggled to make sense of the last forty-eight hours… and so much more. Renji’s mind returned again and again to the alley and sometimes the library, where Byakuya humiliated him and then whispered words of love. In one particularly horrible dream they waltzed, dancing around and around, until Renji was caught up in a swirl of cherry blossoms that became a thousand blades that cut him to ribbons as the music played on….

When he finally woke up, Renji felt as if he hadn’t slept at all. 

He lay there for a long time, staring at the cracks in the ceiling. “I need to be smarter,” he told Zabimaru. He’d tossed the zanpakutō on to the bed, and had curled into it while he slept. Now Renji was on his back; Zabimaru’s hilt on the pillow beside him, as though they lay head-to-head. “I got to learn when to shut up or he’s going to kill me for real one day.”

 _You said what needed saying,_ Zabimaru hissed.

“Yeah, maybe,” Renji agreed, tucking a hand under his head. “But, I knew I was feeling too raw about Inuzuri to talk about her rationally, and this little scene is going to make the sex games he likes to play a bit awkward… at least for me.” Renji shook his head, “I bet he doesn’t even realize what he did, the irony of it. I never tell him when he crosses the line with me--not in the alley or the library or now. Probably should have used that safe word, huh?”

 _He was on us so hard, you couldn’t speak_ , the deeper voice reminded him with a growl. 

“There was that,” Renji muttered. “Plus, you noticed the ‘lieutenant’ at the end, right? Captains are allowed to discipline their subordinates any way they like. Bastard probably did know he shouldn’t treat a lover like that, but the rules say he can do what he wants to his adjutant.”

 _It’s a messy boundary_ , the snake-tail hissed in agreement. The baboon added, _One that’s been fucked up from the start._

“True that,” Renji agreed. It all started when a drunken Byakuya ordered him to undress in the captain’s office. Sure, they’d come a long way from then, but a couple of private ‘I love you’s didn’t change the fact Renji still wasn’t an equal, not even with bankai, and, no matter what he did, he’d never be a _peer._

 _And way to bring up all that ugly class stuff again, you stupid boy,_ Renji admonished himself. _Like, we don’t have enough problems without all my Inuzuri demons biting my ass._

“Man, I’d sure like to leave that place behind for good,” Renji muttered.

He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn’t sense the presence on the other side of the door until there was a polite knock. “Are you there, lieutenant? Are you alone? May I have a moment of your time, sir?”

Renji recognize the Third’s voice. He pulled himself upright, and scrubbed the sleep from his face. “Yeah, come in. I was just talking to my Zabimaru.”

The door slid open cautiously, as if the Third still expected he was interrupting a private moment. He hung on the threshold, and he kept his gaze so averted Renji checked to make sure he hadn’t somehow forgotten stripping out of his uniform to sleep. But, no he was fully dressed, the Third was just being extra obsequious for some reason, “I apologize for the intrusion, sir. Some of the men said they saw you return from the estate, and I wanted to wish you a happy belated birthday.”

“Heh, yeah, thanks,” Renji said, and then shook his head. “Why don’t you come in, sit down? How come you’re acting so formal all of a sudden?”

The Third lifted his head and blinked, “Well, if you’re betrothed to the Lady Rukia, I thought maybe I should start treating you like a Kuchiki.”

Renji burst out laughing. To the the Third’s startled expression, he said, “Your timing’s just awesome, is all. The captain and I just had a huge fight, and yeah… so… no. Rukia and I—“

“Oh no!” The Third’s hands flew to his mouth to cover his horrified expression, “He’s called off your marriage?”

“No,” Renji said, “There never was anything between Rukia and me. I know you always thought so, but that’s not how we are. I tried to tell you this before, but… Look, can we get past this? I want to ask you something about the captain. Something important.”

The Third seemed to take a moment to put aside his confusion in favor of curiosity. “What is it, sir?”

Renji waved him into the room, and the Third perched on the dresser across from Renji’s bed. The room was so narrow that Renji had to shift his legs to make room for the Third’s. “You’ve been in the Sixth a long time. Did you know the captain’s wife at all?” At the Third’s nod, Renji asked, “Do you know why he brought her up out of Inuzuri?”

“Uh… I know the rumors,” the Third admitted. With a shake of his head like he didn’t want to get into it, added, “That was a long time ago, and I was barely seated at the time. I didn’t put much stock in any of it. It was the captain’s personal business, you know, and, for some reason, people were always unfair to her.”

Renji gave him a sidelong glance. “Do you really want me finding out from Matsumoto? Because if you won’t offer anything, that’s who I’ll ask next.”

The Third pointed a finger at Renji, “You’re supposed to be under house arrest.”

Renji crossed his arms in front of his chest, and noted, “Fine. Then, I’ll just send Richiki to the Tenth, and then how many people are going to know before he even makes it back?”

“Damn, you play dirty,” The Third muttered, before confessing with a sigh, “All right, what I heard was that she used to be an orian before the captain settled her contract and set her up as his mistress. Then, I guess they fell in love and he married her.”

Renji sat back until he felt the wall against his shoulders. “You’re kidding me. He actually _bought_ her… he wandered down to the Inuzuri flesh market, bought her off some yakuza thug, and took her home, like some goddamn sick little shopping trip.”

The Third made a horrified choking sound, and sputtered, “I would never say that.”

“No, I’m the only one who’s stupid-ballsy enough to,” Renji said grimly. “No wonder he slammed me to the ground when I brought up his money. Damn. Those two are seriously stuck in some karma-loop."

“Who?”

Renji glanced up, as if suddenly remembering the Third was sitting there. “The captain and his wife. We went to the Human World for my birthday and… ran into her reincarnated.”

“Oh,” all the blood seemed to drain from the Third’s face, “Dear god.”

“Exactly.”


End file.
